I operate on my own strength

I have to tell you something that I am so embarrassed to admit. This morning I dried my hair in my bathroom for the first time in a year! What in the world are you talking about, you say? Well, the plug in my bathroom has officially not worked since I moved into this house, exactly 1 year and 5 days ago.

Yes, I've gone that long without telling Jerry that it's been broken. It totally was not intentional, but I just kept forgetting to tell him. I would always think about it super early in the morning or late at night, and just never could get myself around to telling him.. until yesterday. You see my toilet was broken, which led me to tell Jerry, which led him to ask me if anything else was broken.. and I FINALLY remembered to tell him about the plug. Of course it turned in to a huge fiasco and the plumber and electrician were at the house fixing things all.day.long. yesterday. What a mess!

He couldn't believe it took me a year to tell him that the plugs haven't worked. Going without electricity in my bathroom for a year is silly. Why did I do that?

I've been studying Deuteronomy for the past 5 weeks. This morning in Deuteronomy 27 Moses wraps up everything he's been saying for the past 26 chapters, which reiterates over and over again "love the Lord with all your heart, follow his commands, walk in His ways.." It got my thinking about my life, and how I desire to follow God in every aspect of my life. But here's the deal:

i've been trying to do it in my own strength

God sets all these commands for the children of Israel, but none of them could fulfill them all. No one was perfect. Except Jesus. He was the only person who completely fulfilled the law. And then it hit me.. " Linnae, your heart and your desires are starting to match up with mine, but you cannot do this on your own strength. You've got to let me do it for you… operate through you…."

What a relief! I finally feel like this is a new beginning for me. Cliche? Maybe. But so new to me today.

Why didn't I tell Jerry a long time ago about the plug in my bathroom? Because I operate on my own strength. I want to be independent and fix things myself. I don't want to rely on others. And I especially don't want to rely on God at times (yikes!).

He Knows Us

I was reading this morning about the body of Christ.. 1 Cor. 12: 4-31. And I just wonder if there is anyone out there today who is struggling with where God has them in this season. Maybe you are questioning your job, feeling like you have these giftings but they aren't being used. Or maybe you have a dream that you just never feel is going to be carried out. Whatever it may be, I encourage you to rest over this verse today:

Before I formed you in the womb I KNEW you, before you were born I SET YOU APART....
Jeremiah 1:5

That's pretty powerful, and really awesome to think about. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what God wants to say to me through this verse, but I want to resonate over this today....

Unobservant

I have lived in Dallas for three weeks now. Every morning I get my cup of coffee and sit at the couch in the den. It is such a beautiful room with large windows, a huge fireplace and big, fat comfortable furniture. I love sitting here every morning. There is something about the sun shining in on me, my hot cup of coffee, and my time with my Savior that is just the most precious thing in the world.

This morning I grabbed my cup of coffee and sat down on the couch to start doing my bible study, and for some reason I gaze at the center of the coffeetable and realize that I have never noticed the centerpiece before. It has been there since the day I moved in, (all of this furniture was here when I moved in) and I am just now seeing this decoration for the first time. I mean, I’ve always known that there was something in the middle of the table, but I have never stopped to look at it before.

I thought to myself… I never realized that there are two gold balls and about five straw balls in this bowl type thing. How could it be that I am just now seeing this for the first time, and in all reality, I have seen it at least 100 times?! I sit here every single day, all day long, because this is really where I do most of my work, and here I am wondering why I never stopped to take a look at it.

I am starting to realize as I get older that I am such an unobservant person. But I am really bothered by this centerpiece thing. I just wonder how many things in my life I don’t see or notice because I simply don’t stop to take a look at them. Or I wonder how many people I have come in contact with that I didn’t notice who maybe could’ve used a hug or a word of encouragement.

I wonder how many times God has been trying to speak to me or tell me something but my mind has been distracted by other things. Think about it… I come every morning to this couch to meet with the Lord. I have my coffee, I open my bible, and wait to hear a word or a verse or thought that the Lord has for me that day. But today, I stopped, and I looked, and saw this new thing for the very first time. I mean really saw it.

I don’t want to miss out on what God is doing because I’m trying to keep up with the things I am supposed to be doing (like bible study, and prayer, etc.). I don’t want to miss the opportunity to speak to the girl who is sitting on the front row near me at one of Priscilla’s events because God was allowing me an opportunity to minister and encourage. I don’t want to miss the opportunity to share with the person sitting next to me on the plane about Jesus and His love for them and how they can have a personal relationship with the Creator of the universe!

Lord, Jesus open my eyes to the things You are doing. Expand my mind and thoughts so that I can focus on my surroundings and see how You are working all around me. My hearts desire is to bring You glory. Thank You for opening my eyes this morning, I pray that I will begin living with an open heart and mind. I want to see how You are working. I pray that I won’t keep our relationship to myself but that You would use me to reach others for Your Kingdom and Your glory Lord!